At this point in life I have become so accustomed to following my dreams that no matter what happens, giving up my dream has never been an option. I’ve come to the point where I will give up anything else in my life to see my dreams come true, and I have. I’ve lost friendships, fallen out with family, and I don’t even give dating a second thought. To most people’s standards my life has not even started yet due to the fact that I put off everything with “When I get on ______” which simply means when I get to where I wanna be with my directing career I will focus all other things that do not seem as important right now. This is what I want more than anything, I want this shit so bad that sometimes I wonder if it makes me a bad person for it. I’ve let go of perfectly good friendships for the pursuit of this dream. I mourn them every time, but I always move on with the reasoning being that if they were truly my friend they wouldn’t have gotten in the way of my dream. MY DREAM.
Everything in my life changes except for my dream. People come, people go, I rep one team one day, be on a new one the next, new business relationships form to replace the old ones. People that I call my BROTHERS or SISTERS one day become strangers the next day, but my dream remains constant. It’s the one solid thing in my life that I can always expect to be there. ALWAYS. So I always choose my dream over anything else. It is the one thing I can say that I am loyal to. I’m loyal to the dream that directing will be my ticket to the world, and all I have to do is hang on to it.
This post was suppose to be about feeling bad about some of the things that I have missed out on life and all of the BS I have gone through just to be HERE, which is really a couple steps from nowhere when you look at all of the things I have left to do. But as I typed, it went from self pity, to a self reminder. To whom much is given, much is required. The trials I am given are much harder than the trials of someone average, because I am not aspiring to be someone average.
“When there is no struggle there is no strength” – Oprah Winfrey